Gold and silver drip from the Christmas Tree. Soft angelic music floats around the dimly lit room. A warm fire crackles in the background. Neatly wrapped packages sparkle with anticipation for Christmas Morning. Standing back and admiring this perfect Christmas moment, I quickly snap a picture. Luckily, I preserved that second of impending Christmas Joy.… Continue reading Messy Christmas
It was only the second drink. Sloshing spinning slivers of silvery ice. Two pieces swimming just beneath the surface. Swirling around in synchrony glassed in an endless circle. A tiny shake from his fingers almighty kept them timelessly turning around each other. They crash into each other from time to time, bludgeon themselves against the… Continue reading Drunk for the Angels
Is it the same. Fire burning my insides. The same kind of pain that also burns you. Does it feel the same. Ripping tearing at the what-ifs. Sickening vomit stirring pleasure. I wonder if you feel it, inside up through deep throat and under. I thought I saw you, pull it back, behind that stare,… Continue reading The Same
Wandering around in the darkness, I wish I knew the way to go. Every once in a while, I see a glimmer of light and I run towards it. I know what the light looks like, but I don’t always see where to follow. The tiny spark is sometimes so very far away. In the… Continue reading Guiding Light (Advent Devotion)
She didn’t really know which direction to walk. Just had to walk. Clouds covered only a piece of the sun, burning on her left shoulder. She wanted her sweater, not just to shield the sun, but to cover, swaddle, pull together the uncontrollable thoughts making her head dizzy. Walk forward, no matter where that led… Continue reading How Can She Know the Way?
What do you want for Christmas? A new iPhone. How many times do you think Jolly Ol’ Mall Santa Claus hears that one this year? Wow, the pressures of Christmas presents, selfish expectations, and parenting issues tied up in this one little yearly tradition. Within earshot of course, mom’s eyes shift side to side and… Continue reading Guilt Gift
There are moments when the things that my children say take me totally off guard. Listening to the sweet little voices that come from their young mouths, yet hearing something totally unexpected and shocking. Most of these times it gives me opportunity to reflect on my parenting and try to discover where they learned such… Continue reading Expected Advent
Separate wills, single wants. Distant hopes misaligned with reality. Short lived satisfaction, dreaming of the more. Intensity necessarily short, passion certainly restrained. Those things which thrill and comfort and inspire are fleeting. How many hearts hold on to that which is fleeting. How many souls long for the more. A taste of the completeness that… Continue reading Fleeting Made Whole
Chatter and aching Building and breaking Too deep to find, detect or settle Shouting and hushing Constructing and crushing At nighttime, morning, and in the middle Rumbling under my calm smile Pulsing with a liar’s bile Unsatisfied and yearning Rebellious and returning Hands and heart, mind, body, soul Itching and self-abused Unable to resist the… Continue reading I Like Her
Pins and needles deep inside, slicing and stabbing as each second passes. There is no comfortable way to lay down anymore, every angle tingles in pain. She cringes from muscle cramps, from the frozen positions she calls relaxation. Her mind won’t stop. Her eyes won’t close. Waiting. Watching. But for what exactly? Something that will… Continue reading Something is Coming
Cindy Koch 